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“Hey remember me from ul! You came back to my house one night! :D I lost your number that morning ha”

—

I just received this as a facebook message

I don’t know the person who sent it
He added me a while back and I didn’t think I knew him so I haven’t responded yet (now I know I don’t know him)
Because I definitely did not go back to his house or give him my number
Whoever he thinks I am, he must like, to search them down on facebook and then message them when they don’t accept them
However, he has got the wrong person so clearly he didn’t pay that much attention
Or he was drunk
And he lost her number…bad move
And in his message he laughed at the fact!
So many things I want to reply to this
Not sure what covers this situation tho
because if I tell him I’m not her, he might think I’m lying
That I’m saying I don’t know him instead of telling him I don’t fancy him anymore

Anyone have any thoughts?

I like to be honest

I don’t know why it’s important to me but it is

I hedge what I say so I don’t lie.

So half-truths are my friends in many situations.

I told my mom she was my best friend today

Because well she basically is.

And she wasn’t feeling well and she’s done a lot of stuff for me this week and I wanted to let her know that I appreciate it.

I certainly tell her the most about my life and ask her opinion on stuff more than I would my friends.

Like I have good ones but I know I count on her more.

Anyway I don’t think she took it how I meant, I think she thought I was like “oh I don’t have a real best friend anymore cus there’s a weird overlap between my secondary school friends and my college friends”

oh well

Haha for once I actually took part in the whole “spring-cleaning” thing

Must be growing up…!

And in other news:

My politics exam went quite well today I think :)
I made egg-less brownies cus I didn’t have any eggs (bit different but still nice!)
I saw my kind-of ex today for the first time since the last time…tg I was on the phone and had an excuse to only exchange pleasantries so it wouldn’t be awkward. I miss him a little but I wish I didn’t.

You know when you do something because it seems like a good idea at the time?

And then you think back and go “oh God”

yeah.

Pictures from last night :/

I feel like I get punished for every tiny bit of happiness I have

Whenever I have a good day, its balanced with a crap one.

Whenever I smile or laugh, I have to cry an equal amount.

I feel like the world is throwing stuff at me all the time and that it’s trying desperately to break me. I’m so ashamed of how unable I feel to cope with all of this at the moment.

I just want it all to stop.

I was so content being single

My attitude was ah sure theres no panic. If the right guy comes along, sure he can be my boyf. But I’m not going out and getting one just for the sake of it, just so I can say oh yeah I have a boyf. I’m not one of those people that need a boyf to be happy or feel valid.

But then, for the first time in a while, someone came along who made me stop and think. And it hasn’t worked out. Which was a little bit disappointing.

And so I’m still single. But now, there’s a tiny voice in my head saying that’s for all the people you’ve said no to. No one you want to is ever going to say yes. Forever alone type of thing.

I guess my point is that it’s easy to be single when you choose to be. But less so if you keep thinking what if.

I’m not moping and I’m not cross. I just…I thought I’d chosen carefully. But it appears not. And I kind of hate myself for the tiny part of me that is missing him. I don’t like letting people have that kind of power.

But they do.

I care. No matter what I say, I care. And life would be much easier if I didn’t.